The further I get from being in that moment, the more annoyed I get about the movie’s incredibly typical casting decisions. On sober reflection, there are a few things that bother me about the film now that I’m not focused on just laughing at the jokes. The only truly unsatisfying thing about the movie is structure: the plot sort of peters off at the end without even the conclusion of “and then everyone got eaten.” It feels like the story just runs out of steam and stops, its characters and funny ideas exhausted, before an actual conclusion is achieved. The sounds they came up with for the zombie kids, roaring and shrieking and over it all a childish giggle, were nothing short of disturbing. But whoever did the sound design for this movie deserves a medal. As a certified horror wimp, I didn’t find it at all scary it doesn’t even meet the oog factor of the Cabin in the Woods. It’s funny, it’s got plenty of fake gore, and it’s got a few tense, creepy scenes without relying on jump scares. And last there’s the weird, socially awkward genius guy Doug (Leigh Wannell) who turns out to be the funniest out of all of them because he’s got such good foils to play off. Jack McBrayer is rather Kenneth-like in his portrayal of Tracy, but considering Kenneth was my favorite part of 30 Rock, I think that’s a good thing. Nasim Pedrad does an excellent impression of a coherent Sarah Palin as gun-obsessed Rebekah. Lucy (Alison Pill) seems like a stereotypical first grade teacher until she reveals the seething rage she keeps under her cheery exterior.
Rainn Wilson plays Wade, the self-consciously masculine PE teacher who ultimately relieves his glory high school athlete days by being a team player. No.) We’ve all been some shade of that guy for at least a couple minutes of our lives, or known someone who has. He’s particularly funny and painful to watch if you’re a writer yourself, as he tells everyone, a note of desperation in his voice, that he’s a capital-W Writer rather than a teacher and has the kids in his class read his rough draft out loud. We have Clint, who is in denial of the fact that he’s a teacher in favor of his dream of being a writer. The characters fighting for their lives against the zombie hordes are generally pretty lovable. It’s also the setup for a lot of very creepy shots, because any horror element is about a thousand times more discomfiting when there’s a kid involved.Ĭooties has the same general mix of horror and funny that I saw and loved in Shaun of the Dead, though the humor is less dry and the horror is a little more gory.
The twist that this is zombie children versus elementary school teachers isn’t exactly revolutionary, and it doesn’t need to be. The plot is the same as most zombie movies: zombies happen, people try to survive, and since this is a comedy, hijinks ensue. (Because he was born on 9/11 you see, obviously sent by God to sit in Clint’s classroom and play with his cell phone instead of paying attention.) No, what made me think that somewhere in this script lives the experience of a teacher was when I watched the main character, Clint (Elijah Wood) talking to his incoherent, air quote-wielding principal about his “pedagogical style.” Well, that, and when he deals with the obnoxious child named Patriot. And it’s not even necessarily the unholy glee the teachers show when taking out some of the evil children with makeshift weapons later on.
I don’t necessarily say this because of the basic concept of kids turning into flesh-eating zombies after eating tainted chicken nuggets that are a plain call back to the pink slime scare. I think Cooties was either written by an elementary school teacher, or written by someone who is good friends with one.
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